On condescension

Bailey: "It's your go [at poker], HL."

HL: "After I tell my story, young lady."
 

There's something for everyone out there...

James: "I joined a jive class... which is a great place to go if you want to dance with middle-aged women for 30 seconds at a time."

Casual xenophobia

Andrew: "What's the best thing to do in Edinburgh in a single evening?"

HL: "Take the train back down to London."

Medical snobbery

James: "My dad is a doctor."

HL: "A real doctor?"

James: "A GP."

HL and Cez together: "No, then."

On pausing at inappropriate times

James, learn to punctuate your sentences properly, or they end up with a completely different meaning...

James: "My girlfriend lives in the forest... of Dean."

and later

"My Dad hasn't got long left... until he retires."

BBO Hallowe'en party 2013

Re: poker.
Andrew: "If anyone's got a 7 or 11, that's quite good..."

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Re: acronyms
James O'D: "Defra being..."
Blaise: "The Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs."
James O'D: "Where's the D? Oh, Department."

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Re:
James O'D: "My friend Duncan, who I'm doing this kiss thing with..."
They are allegedly performing in a talent show as members of the band Kiss.

Also...

The Quote Book -

bringing you wit, wisdom, innuendo, and multiple feet in mouths since September 2005!

And innuendo.
Did I mention the innuendo?

Happy (slightly belated) 3rd birthday, and 3rd anniversary of the first quote!

Collected quotes from Joe's "I've handed in my dissertation" party...

Joe: "When the voices talk to you: stabstabstab."

Joe: "Stop trying to stab yourself."
Darrell: "I'm not, I'm just trying to feel..."

Darrell: "The problem isn't with slugs, it's with homelessness in snails."

Chris: "The trouser orthodontist: keeping your trousers up, pulling your teeth down!"

(I may have accredited these wrongly - it was a very good night, after all - if so, let me know and it'll be fixed.)