What do you reckon this was about?

Nick: If the ball is inside you're more likely to pull.

Historians we are NOT!

James: "Yeah, the Spanish Inquisition... it was meant to be the Spanish Gentle Chat, but it got a bit out of hand."

This man is a LEGEND...

[during a supervision in the Pathology labs, where he was explaining things to Funmi the medic]

Jonathan Roos, BA: "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to fondle your breasts with my paper."

He's Swedish, awww, silly foreigner...

A pet is for life...

Jilly Pearson:

"Ever since The Curse of the Were-Rabbit, there's been a trend for people wanting really big bunnies as pets..."

[class laughs]

"NOT A JOKE! We're still dealing with abandoned terrapins from kids who were into the Turtles craze! We're still funding Dalmatians in rescue centres after 101 Dalmatians! Dulux paint has a lot to answer for... and as for THAT BLOODY TOILET PAPER..."

"...because that could be construed as racist."

Medic lecturer: "So, many diseases are transmitted by close contact with animals; licking your pets, sleeping in the same bed... I'd say that the prevalence of some of these diseases are higher in certain parts of the United Kingdom, but I can't, because that could be construed as racist. [pause] My wife is Welsh, by the way."

Penis envy?

In a Vertebrae Palaeontology lecture...

David Norman: At this stage it becomes normal to be obsessed with reproduction - willies and such

[Student gets up to leave for some water]

David Norman: Sorry, did I offend you?

[Class laughs. Student goes red]

...

[Later]

David Norman: Willies don't get preserved in the fossil record, at least as far as I know