Always best to know when to stop

Andrew is fairly new to poker and has been drawn to bet far too much money on a bad hand, which he eventually loses...

Andrew: "I just - he raised me, and I couldn't stop betting..."
HL: "Don't ever go to Las Vegas. You'll leave naked. With AIDS."
Others: "...AIDS?!"
HL: "Prostitution for more gambling money."

He's like a mammary GPS

During a conversation about obesity at BA dinner -

Richard: "General rule: breasts should go past bellybutton, not the other way around."
[I look down, Richard looks confused]
Me: "I was just checking how this slouched posture affects things."
Richard: "It doesn't. I'm aware of the location of your tits at all times, don't worry."
[pause]
Richard: "You really shouldn't let me near alcohol."

On status cars

HL: "When people see someone driving by in a BMW, they think 'Wow, that person has more money than me.'"
Me: "I think a lot of them think 'Look at that wanker in the BMW.'"
HL: "I want to be that wanker in the BMW."